He double-clicked.

In cell Z999, a formula appeared: =IF(Leo_Learns_Lesson, “Freedom”, “Eternal PivotTable”)

The demonic spreadsheet chuckled. “Because you searched for ‘free’ like a starving man in a desert. You wanted the brand. The real thing. And you ignored the open arms of perfectly good substitutes.”

Leo grabbed his phone. He didn’t search for cracked software. He typed: How to uninstall demonic Excel.

And somewhere in the dark web, a cursed spreadsheet waited for its next desperate user, ready to turn their balance sheet into a soul sheet.

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